Sunday 1 March 2009

Being Optimistic vs Being Pessimistic

Problem:
I was grown up in an environment that honesty and truth were hailed and dishonesty was blamed and disgraced. Indeed, lie was somehow a stranger in my life.

However, the fact is that the outside world (society and business) is not driven by honesty but by need and fear often which may leed to lie and deceiving approaches.

The world is full of lies, some are releaved soon, some very late and some never.

Recently, I had a discussion with a Customer Service Officer from Three and I wanted to cancel my mobile contract that it was only one day that I had got it! She lied, lied and lied and at the end she said we can't cancel your contract because you said you have used the new mobile phone we sent you which is a big lie and I never said that and I never used their phone. If I want to get it further I have to take it to the court which costs me more time and money obviously.

In other occasion, when I was looking for job through job agencies I heard so many lies from them...

Why Many People Lie?
  • They need to lie to get what they want
  • They fear of the truth
  • They enjoy lying
  • They don't have believe in God or even if they do they don't trust God that they can fulfill their needs with honesty

Solution:

There are 2 main attitudes we can have with people:
  • Optimistic: it's high likely that people are honest unless it's proved otherwise.
  • Pessimistic: it's high likely that people are dishonest and deceitful unless it's proved otherwise.

Being optimistic or pessimistic are both good and beneficial we just need to be aware when to choose which approach.

The attitude we choose to have at each time determines our behaviors, words and thoughts. Before choosing our attitude we better do a quick analysis on the other person's needs, fears and believes, then we will be able to choose a wiser approach.

We would be happier maybe if we always be optimistic; however it's not a safe approach and indeed it's very naive sometimes.

With sales people specifically, be pessimistic because they have needs which are against your needs. I have also friends who are in sales and they all acknowledge this.

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