How to Build Trust in Yourself

This is the key foundation to all achievements and successes; Trust Yourself, Trust In Your Abilities and Potential, Trust Yourself that You Will Handle It.

Affirmations that might help:

• I truly trust myself and I truly trust myself indeed.
• I listen to my inner wisdom
• I am intuitive
• I know I'll handle it
• I do take risks and I trust myself; even if I fail I trust myself that I can get over it
• I build the sense of self-trust every day

Learn the science of trusting yourself and enjoy using it every day.

to be continued...

http://www.ehow.com/how_2105384_trust-yourself.html

Your Confident Voice is Infectious

Naturally, all people have Confident and Unconfident voice depending on the situation they are in but they often get used to apply one of which.

When you are aware of your confident voice and you use it, then it will be infectious. By this I mean, other people will feel your confidence and can easily have confidence on you.

Hear your confident voice, imagine when was the last time you use it.

Using our confident voice is so joyful, however, we should be aware of the difference between an aggressive voice and a confident one because the border line is very thin.

Experience:
Another interesting point I would like to make is that when we use our confident voice, our personality, our thoughts and behaviours get changed.

My experience says just use confident voice while talking and you will be self-confident automatically.

I also experienced that using my confident voice I stammer much less.

Next:
Practice for one day only talking with your confident voice and see the results

Stammering and Confidence

Stammering:

1% of the population of the world stammer and not every knows about it.

Stammerers stammer less or more depending on the situation, to whom they are speaking and their mood.

The way people stammer is very different and it's unique for each stammerer.

Stammering is not just the physical struggle in saying something but it has much more effects internally. It can destroy the confidence, ego and hope of the stammerer if left untackled. There's a war within which must be fought and won with wisdom.


When/where you need to speak:

In many places we need to speak in life and this can become a real challenge for a stammerer e.g.

1. Having a video call with a colleague or client
2. Presenting at a conference for known or unknown people
3. Having conference call with known or unknown people
4. Having a phone call to a known or unknown person

Causes of fear:

Generally public speaking creates fear for most people but this fear is doubled for those who stammer and the causes are:

1. Fear of looking foolish when stammering
2. Fear of failure in succeeding what you want your audience know or understand
3. Fear of failure in gaining the respect and listening you deserve
4. Fear that others underestimate you because you stammer

There are 2 aspects about stammering:

1. Overt:

What you see when a person stammers e.g.

• Struggle in face, mouth
• Sliding words
• Bouncing words
• Loosing eye contact while speaking

2. Covert

What is within of a stammerer is much bigger than what is outside (Overt). This involves the fears, negative emotions, feelings and thoughts which are developed gradually within e.g.

• Getting depressed
• Loosing confidence
• Getting dissapointed and sad
• Developing a fear whitin as described above which results in avoiding behaviours and not doing any action
• Avoiding stammering which makes it worse and persistent e.g. avoiding situations of speak, avoiding words on which we stammer more
• Self-hate because the voice system is unable to glorify the power within and meeting the expectations

Tips:

• The more you avoid stammering the bigger the fear becomes
• You must allocate time (about 15 minutes) to practice speaking fluently every day
• You must consult an expert and therapist if you haven't done so yet
• The more sensitive you are about changing yourself, the more stammering you get

Possible solutions for the stammerer

The best advise is to attend therapy courses and to consult with a good therapist.

My other advise is to practice regularly every day for about 10-15 minutes the techniques you learn.

Unfortunately, there is no known cure for stammering but there are some suggested solutions to consider:

• Understand stammering, emotions and behaviours involved with it.
• Desensitize yourself about stammering. Love yourself as you are even when you stammer.
• Use block modification techniques including pre-block, in-block and post-block modification techniques
• Relax your voice system and shoulders frequently.
• Do something to boost your confidence every single day.
• At the time of failure, don't get disappointed but create a new positive experience.
• Pray and ask guidance and strength
• Speak slowly and smoothly with confidence
• Practice and practice and practice and never give up
• Self-advertise yourself. Say "I stammer please bear with me". In this way, you turn stammering to your advantage and credit so please will listen to you better.
• Listen to your voice and the way you speak while speaking. This helps to have control over how you speak and consequently it can enable you to change the way you speak.

Boost your confidence:

• Know that it's your right to stammer so don't fear or shame of it, go for it!
• Know that it's your right that people listen to you and if they don't they have issue not you!
• Show respect and listen well in communications
• Have proper posture and show your confidence in your posture; the way you walk, the way you sit
• Exercise regularly
• Keep your eye contact while stammering
• Practice every day
• Read positive and self-development books
• Prepare properly before your talks
• Self affirm positively and keep doing so with visualization and in details.
• Learn from failures but forget them quickly. Remember the success stories and repeat them
• Help others to boost their confidence as well
• Controlled and positive aggression is essential in boosting confidence
• Have 10-20 deep breathing every hour
• To be confident you must be courageous! The Courage to stand out in the crowd, the courage not just to be a face in the crowd!

LINKS:

http://www.stammering.org/

You do not need confidence!

There are hundreds of books about how to gain self-confidence but the fact is that in order to become successful in whatever we want to achieve in life, we do not need confidence at all!

We do not need to be confident to do something and not many people have understood this.

If you have enough confidence in all aspects of your life, good for you and this article is not for you but if you don't have it, the good news is you don't need it!

Here, I will explain the Action & Confidence Workflow:

1) Our creation:
All human beings when they are born they have senses that help them to have inputs and understanding e.g. they can see, hear and feel the hunger. This is the first step in the confidence workflow.



2) Desire/greed/need/fear:
This is a step that our desire, ego, need or fear is realized. This realization sometimes is done by comparing ourselves with the other person.

3) Visualization/Imagination:
After we keep seeing, hearing and having the desire, need or fear; then we start imagining and thinking about what we want in more details. The more we grow at this stage the closer we get to the next step. We see dreams of our achievement.

4) Passion:
When we keep imagining and visualizing then the passion is created within us. Having said that at this stage we have no ability or experience but the passion is kept increasing. We really want it.
It's important to say that at each stage all the previous steps are repeated automatically. It's not something we do consciously often, it's what is done unconsciously and automatically within us. Without being complete in each stage we don't get to the next phase.

When this passion gets to a burning level, the next phase is going to begin.

5) Courage for Action:
After having a burning passion, detailed imagination, strong need or desire then our courage for action is created. Our passion is strong enough that generates a courage within us to move and act towards getting what we want.

6) Action:
It's important to say that before any action to be made many spiritual and emotional processes, as explained above, are happening inside us.

Mainly our courage and passion and with all the previous steps move us towards action. We go out and ask people, we search for it, we try it. As we continue acting, we gain knowledge and experience.

As we are passionate and courageous enough and action oriented, our knowledge in the gets improved. We keep getting knowledge and find solutions for the problem or the goal we have.

At the time of failure again the process works. If our passion is not greater that our fear of failure, then we give up otherwise we try another solution!

As we do consistent action, we get closer to start the next phase.

7) Achievement/experience:
Our knowledge, constant action, courage, burning desire and passion leads us to achievement. Once we achieved it we become experienced.

8) Confidence:
As we achieve and we gain knowledge and experience, our confidence gets build up. This confidence helps us to do further actions or keep doing current actions well. But the most important point is that confidence is built up automatically.

Indeed confidence is a result of our previous achievements and knowledge and is not necessary important for our next success and achievement.

If we have it good for us, if we don't we must know it's not a key factor for success unlike the teachings of many books written.

Here, I will write few examples to clarify exactly how the process works

Example 1: Getting a job

Example 2: Getting fit

Example 3: Passing an exam

Example 4: Buying a house

Example 5: Starting a business


In conclusion, what we should focus on is to understand the Action & Confidence Workflow and to know that for any achievement confidence is not a key factor at all but our PASSION, VISUALISATION and COURAGE for ACTION.